Our Feisty Fisks

Raising the female population of Indiana one child at a time

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Thursday, December 28, 2006

Is that urine? Cause, it's not my-ine.

Tonight we went out to dinner with some friends at The Cheesecake Factory. Neither Doni, Ava, or I had ever been there before, but we had heard many good things about it. TCF did not disappoint. However, let me get to the highlight of the evening....

After dinner the three of us took a stroll around the mall and we bought several little things. As we were getting ready to leave, it was approaching 8 o' clock (Ava's bedtime). We figured this would work pretty well because she would fall asleep in the car on the way home and then we could just put her to bed upon arrival. To prevent having to wake Ava up to change her diaper when we got home, we decided to change her in the back seat of the car before leaving.

Now, it hasn't been typical winter weather in Indiana lately. Today's high was in the 50's. We didn't have a white Christmas, nor could we have since the temperature was above freezing. Being fairly mild, I didn't have a problem with changing Ava's diaper on the back seat, the car door open, and me standing outside doing my diaper duties.

If we would have been in an operating room, Doni would have taken the role of the scrub nurse, handing me the necessary wipes and diaper as needed. She had several bags in her hands in addition to the diaper bag, so I was running ahead of her in terms of supply and demand. Had I been thinking, I would have not made the critical mistake I was about to make.

What is the first rule of Diaper-Changing Club?
THERE IS NO DIAPER-CHANGING CLUB!?!?!
What is the second rule of Diaper-Changing Club?
Do not leave the baby's naked bottom unprotected for any longer than is absolutely necessary!


Ignoring the second rule of Diaper-Changing Club, I pulled Ava's used diaper out from under her before Doni handed me the new diaper. As I took the diaper from her and began to unfold it, I felt a whisp of cool breeze pass over my shoulder. My eyes followed it down to Ava's level. It flicked past her nether regions with a sense of purpose, as if to teach me a lesson. From places not to be described came a well-spring of yellowy body fluid. I practically dove to get the diaper under her, but my hands were not quite fast enough. Helpless, I watched her urine run down the crevices of the upholstery, pool, and seep into the fabric.

Not since Ava was several weeks old had she actually urinated WHILE being changed. Apparently all it takes is a burst of cool air to get the juices flowing. After we got home and put Ava to bed, I went back outside and began cleaning the seat. As I scrubbed, I imagined the classified ad we would place if we were trying to sell our vehicle......


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