Poo for Poo's Sake

"What's so funny?", originally uploaded by Ava's Antics.

As I've been home on vacation with Ava, I've had the opportunity, nay, the privilege, of changing a significantly higher proportion of Ava's diapers than before. So when she crawled up to me this morning with the aroma of Poo de Toilette, I thought I was prepared for the necessary changing. Never have I been more wrong...

I laid Ava on the changing table and slid her out of her shorts. As she began pawing at the diaper her sense of urgency became apparent to me. I gave her a reassuring look that said, "Relax. I've done this before."

Peeling back the diaper was like pulling plastic wrap off of warm pie filling. Everywhere there had been diaper, there was now poo. In the back, front, middle, up into the sides.... this stuff was everywhere. The smell was wafted throughout her room by the A/C. It permeated every breath. Solely breathing through my mouth didn't even help as it found its way into my nose regardless.

I furiously began ripping wipes from the container. Although I would normally be frustrated when they came out more than one at a time, there was no better situation than this for that to happen. Unfortunately, Ava had stuck both hands in the middle of the mess before I could put the first wipe to use. Apparently its itchy to have excrement all up in your business.

After several tears, half a box of wipes, and a stern conversation about putting hands in your feces, everything was under control. We said a prayer as this foul creation was exorcised from our house into the garbage can, "...and please bless the garbage-man, he'll need it."

Later, I told Doni about all that she had missed this morning. "So it was definitely a two-person diaper," she asked. I replied, "More like six." "Two for the diaper and one to hold each limb," she said. "Yeah, and she stuck her hands in it," I informed her as I looked up to see Ava's fingers in her mouth.

Step-off

Updating her blog, originally uploaded by Ava's Antics.

We have reached another milestone in that, this week, Ava has started walking. She has been getting pretty good at standing without needing to hold onto something. However, she lacks the confidence to take more than one or two steps on her own accord. Doni and I have been sitting on the floor about 6 feet apart, holding Ava under the arms facing the other person, and encouraging her to walk to that parent.

You could probably describe her initial attempts as "falling with style", but she is definitely getting better at this balance thing. She now will come to a stop halfway between us if she is about to fall, steady herself, and continue. Next step.... The Electric Slide.

Ava "Eyebrows" Fisk

"I woke up for THIS?!?!", originally uploaded by Ava's Antics.

While feeding Ava last week, Doni elicited a truly primal facial expression our of her. I don't remember exactly what was said, but Ava was not pleased. Instead of showing her displeasure through the expected "fake cry", she furrowed her brow and shot us a stare. Unexpectedly for her, this scowl was met with an eruption of laughter as she had never done this before. We got her to repeat it several times by making the same face back to her. Is it wrong to reinforce this behavior if its REALLY funny?

Since we have begun feeding her more and more table foods, she has started assuming that anytime we eat something she is entitled to a portion of it. How long it has been since she last ate has no bearing on it whatsoever. Today I sat on the couch eating some soup for lunch. She stood at my knees begging for some spoonfuls of beef stew goodness. I gave her a couple chunks, but the bowl was soon empty. To her dismay, I informed her of this. Her face morphed into a scowl that was like daggers to my soul.

I thought this wasn't supposed to happen until her teens...

To My Daughter

Sleepy time, originally uploaded by Ava's Antics.

I recline back in the chair holding you across my arms. You quietly look out the window to the blue sky behind me. A cool breeze comes through the window blowing your hairs in fits of movement. It occurs to me that your hair's tips have been there since the day you were born.

Your hair blows and settles.... blows and settles....

Who will you become?...

What will define you?...

What will you pursue?...

What will be your passions and dreams?...

Whatever course your life takes, wherever you go, whatever you do... I will always love you.

-Dad

Poop Surprise

"Who let this person write a book?!?", originally uploaded by Ava's Antics.

Getting Ava ready for her bath today I smelled something that was not quite right. Now, I had just farted, but this smell had not come from me. This smell was distinctly Ava-esque. By this time I had her disrobed down to her diaper, so I peeked in the back. Nothing. Woo-hoo! I'll take a baby fart over a baby turd any day.

We were already in the bathroom, so the easiest way to get her diaper off was to put my foot on the toilet lid and sit her on my knee straddling my leg. I held her with one hand and undid the diaper straps with the other. Doni said the water was ready, so I grabbed Ava under the arms and lifted her into the air. Our routine down pat, Doni proceeded to pull off her diaper.

From my view, I initially just saw a diaper with a skid mark on it. This could be easily explained in my mind by a wet fart. Doni, however, had a much better view of the real situation. In the milliseconds that followed, her mouth went agape as a turd the size of a Little Debbie Swiss Cake Roll plopped to the ground. It had hung on just long enough for the diaper to be removed from its trajectory to the floor.

If you thought this was the end of the excitement, you are wrong. Sparky, getting a whiff of this aromatic, chocolate-like wonder, had to be held back. He has a habit for inhaling anything that Ava drops to the ground. In most cases, it works in his favor. Not today Sparky.... not today.

Safety First

"Let's bake a cake", originally uploaded by Ava's Antics.

On Saturday I finally began to install the safety latches on our kitchen cabinets. I was at least 4 months late in doing this because this was around the time she started crawling. You could also say I was 12 months late because you should have your house prepared for a child from the time they enter the house. Either way, we've had them for at least 16 months and they've only been collecting dust in her closet.

I was stuck trying to install them while watching Ava because Doni was at a hair appointment. It's hard enough to line those things up just right when you're trying to install them by yourself. Throw in a 12 month old child and you're having more fun than a barrel of monkeys. She would NOT leave me alone for longer than it took for her to crawl back from where I had last sat her. Of course! Why would she let me install them in peace if she would no longer be able to drag the pots and pans out on the floor? I should have known better.